Most of the families I connect with share that their adoption journey was primarily motivated by their faith in some way. Even if fertility played a factor in their journey to adoption, they felt that the Lord laid adoption on their hearts- sometimes years before- and this is an answer to the call of adoption. Personally, my husband and I both independently felt that adoption was how we wanted to start our family, and through prayer and learning more about our options for family-building, we knew that adoption would be a core part of our family. We felt that adoption was an earthly reflection of our identity as Christians, adopted into God’s family.
While most families would equate a call with adoption as a call to parenting, there may be something more to consider here. If we look at examples in scripture, often the calls or identity that is spoken over the people in the Bible have a delayed timeline. In Genesis we see two examples. Abraham was called the father of nations, but it was many years before he saw the fruit of being an earthly father. Joseph had a dream that he would have authority over his brothers, and it was decades later, through a lot of trials, imprisonment, and multiple betrayals that ultimately led him to a position of leadership in Egypt that saved his family from famine. David was anointed as king, but then returned to the pasture to be a shepherd, and ultimately had years of trouble until he actually assumed the throne of King. Having a call and a delay are scriptural examples for us. If we look at them, we can see in our hindsight, big-picture perspective that God was at work even in those years. We see the leadership skills, character building and perfect positioning that happened during that waiting time.
I wonder what it is that the Lord does between our call to adoption and the “fruit” of being parents. For some families, it is a few short months between that tug of adoption and the time of holding a new baby in their arms. For others, it may be years before they are financially ready or in a position to get started. Once applying to agencies, some families present their profile once or twice, while others present their profile many times, each “rejection” stinging a little more. Some families experience disrupted adoptions. Some embryo adoptions don’t become pregnancies. We have to wonder, what is God doing? Didn’t He call us to this?
I would implore you to consider what it is that the Lord can do through your call to adoption. He can use this time to educate you about empathy and best practices for expecting/birth parents. You can learn more about God’s provision as you watch $20 donations and grant applications become a fully funded adoption. Your marriage and family relationships can be strengthened as you persevere through the ups and downs. You can join a community of hopeful adoptive parents and be an encouragement to one another to keep going instead of being stuck in a comparison trap or having feelings of jealousy. You can become more rooted in Scriptures and aware of what keeps you steady when your circumstances and future timeline is completely unknown. You can know what is true and unchanging when disappointment feels unbearable. You can have joy in obedience to the Lord and hope in the good gifts that the Father gives us each day.
What I often tell adoptive parents is this: You are going to change so much through this. What you know about the Lord is going to grow so much.
So – you said yes to the call of adoption. What else are you open to in this journey? How will you allow growth to happen in this season?
For more support, reach out to your Adoption Consultant who is ready to pray for you & listen to you (and redirect you if needed) when you are having a difficult time. You are not alone!
Will Our “Yes” Ever Come?
A Letter From A Birth Mother To The Son She’s Never Met
Surrender In The Adoption Process
Adoptee Perspective: In The Valley Of Adoption