When families who already have children in their home consider domestic infant adoption, it’s not uncommon for them to grapple with the question, “How will this affect our other kids?” As an Adoption Consultant with Christian Adoption Consultants, I’ve been so blessed to watch God knit families together through domestic infant adoption. One of my favorite things as a Consultant is hearing about the love and bond that God grows between siblings through adoption. I’m so thankful to have the opportunity to share with you some stories this week from the perspective of siblings!
Below are thoughts from Gianna, a high schooler who went from being an only child to being a big sister a few years ago when her parents were clients of mine at CAC. Thank you, Gianna, for sharing your heart with us!
When you learned that your parents planned to adopt, what were your thoughts/feelings? “When I found out my parents were planning to adopt, I had mixed emotions. On one hand, I was ecstatic because I had always wanted a sibling and could not wait until I had a little brother or sister. However on the other hand, I had doubts that my family would never get picked, or the birth mother would change her mind once we were picked. I did not want to get my hopes up for something that may never happen until it was legally finalized. I tried to contain my feelings because I knew I would be devastated if the adoption did not work out. However, once the adoption was legal, I was the happiest girl in the world and filled with more love than I knew ever was possible.”
How has adoption surprised you?“Adoption has surprised me in many different ways. First, I never thought that adoption would affect me as much as it has. Adoption has made me a much stronger pro-life supporter than I was previously. I could not fathom my life would be like without William. If William’s biological mother had an abortion instead of placing him for adoption, I would have never known him. The thought of this makes me a fierce fighter for the end of all abortion. I cannot wait to attend the March for Life 2020 with my school’s Respect Life Club to fight for the end of abortion and instead the “growth of adoption.” Secondly, adoption has made me softer, more patient, and more loving. It has shown me a whole new type of love. I was an only child for 13 years, and I felt a sense of emptiness in my heart. However once we adopted William, I experienced a whole new type of love that I had never felt before. William has made my heart feel full, and I am so thankful for that. There is nothing like hearing the pitter patter of little feet coming into my room to wake me up in the morning, and the big hug and kiss he gives me. The sibling bond we share is unbreakable. Every time I look at him I think how lucky I am to have him for my brother, my forever buddy. Lastly, adoption has made me a more gracious person. I am forever thankful that adoption has given me a sibling, and I owe it all to God’s plan. William truly is the greatest blessing, and I am reminded of the blessing of adoption each and every day when I hear his laughter.”
What thoughts do you have for someone who isn’t sure that adoption will be a positive thing for their family?“I would share my personal experiences with adoption and tell them how much brighter, fuller and complete my life has gotten since adopting my little brother. He truly was the missing piece to our family puzzle. I often felt lonely when I was an only child, but now I have a lifelong best friend that will always be by my side. Adoption has been nothing but positive for my family, and I am a better person because of it. Before Will, I always felt loved as I still do, but now I can show MY love to him. I am so grateful every day that my family was chosen to be Will’s forever family. We even celebrate his “forever family” day with a party. Because of my experience, I am now a firm supporter of adoption. I believe that more and more people should adopt because it truly is the greatest blessing. It is the BEST thing my family ever did!”
What do you wish more people knew/understood about adoption? “I wish that more people understood that just because you are not biologically related, does not mean the connection and love is any different. I love my little brother with my whole entire heart, and it never even crosses my mind that he is not my biological brother. I also wish people would not fear an “open” adoption. It’s not as scary and intimidating as people may think. I see it as a positive with more people loving Will. It will actually make everything smoother once he can fully understand and he will never wonder through his childhood who his biological family is. I am just so very grateful that they chose my family. Adopting my brother has changed me in ways that are indescribable. I used to wonder what it would be like to have a little brother, now I can’t imagine life without him. His smile is infectious and makes me smile more. His laugh is contagious and makes me laugh more. His love is something I’ve never felt before. Will has brought so much happiness to my family. I am truly blessed to call him my brother, my forever friend and thank God every day for him.”
For more information about domestic infant adoption, please contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org. I’d love to connect with you!