The journey to parenthood is unique to every couple. For Sam and Angela, it was a seven-year wait to become parents and a family of three. Today Angela shares the heartbreak and joys of finding their way to their son.
“Faithful is He who calls you, who also will do it.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:24
In March of 2021, we had already been trying for a family for five years. In our prayers and petition before the Lord, we were moved to explore adoption. When we started acknowledging adoption as an option, we began hearing from friends and family who were all tied to adoption! A friend of ours introduced us to Christian Adoption Consultants and spoke highly of the vetting process for the adoption agencies, the integrity of the organization, and the consultants’ advocacy for their clients. We reached out and connected with Susan.
Soon after, I became pregnant for the first time, so pursuing adoption took a backseat. Fast forward to November: we went through a whirlwind of personal events–including two miscarriages. At the lowest point in our journey to growing our family, we again connected with Susan! After our phone call with her, we were filled with a sense of life and peace. Sam and I looked at each other and knew we were being moved to start the adoption process.
We quickly got to work – filling out paperwork, working on our profile book, starting our home study process, and sharing the exciting news with our friends and family. By March 2022, we were home study approved and active with multiple agencies. During that first month, we received so many cases. At that pace, we were sure we’d be matched quickly! However, as the months passed, the cases started coming in much more slowly.
After nine months of waiting, we expected a “not yet” every time we presented. We were questioning if there was something about us that the expecting moms didn’t like. Pregnancy announcements were becoming more difficult to receive. And our initial excitement was quickly dimming. We decided to pick ourselves out of the lull by planning to visit my family overseas. We spent weeks looking online for the best flight deals and the best time to go. However, whenever we found a good deal, something would hold us back from purchasing tickets. One night, I found myself asking God why it was so difficult to buy tickets. What was holding us back?
A few days later, in December, we received an email about an expecting mom due in January. The expecting mom listed very specific criteria of what she was looking for in a family, and we met every single one! We quickly decided to present but ran into some technical difficulties with our background checks expiring soon. We shared with Susan that this case felt so different from the others, and she reassured us she was advocating for us. A week later, we heard from the agency that the details had been worked out, and the expecting mom wanted to have a phone call with us.
I was a ball of nerves before the phone call. What if she didn’t like the way we talked? What if she changes her mind at the last minute? But the second we got on the phone with her, the nerves fell away. Our conversation with her flowed so easily. At the end of that conversation, she told us our favorite sentence of 2022, “Would you guys like to become parents to this baby?”
I still remember the quiet moment of utter disbelief followed by the squeals of excitement and tears. This was it! We were finally becoming parents! We had two weeks to get everything ready. We packed our car with some baby essentials and headed down to Florida. Through a church friend, we were connected with a fellow believer who took us in and treated us like family. While down in Florida, she lodged and fed us – no questions asked. We now lovingly call her “Granny Judy.”
When we arrived at the hospital, we met up with the expecting mom in person for the first time. It still felt so surreal at that point. The hospital staff moved quickly, and within two hours, I was in scrubs and inside with her. I had envisioned the delivery, but I was unprepared for the flood of emotions. As we held him in those first few moments, everything felt so unbelievable.
However, we were still withholding our excitement because we knew Birth Mom had 48 hours to change her mind. Those 48 hours were just as nerve-wracking as the wait until then. But through all our education concerning adoption, we knew it was essential for mama to spend time with her baby. So as difficult as it was, we took him to his Birth Mom whenever she wanted to see him. Two days later, our attorney arrived and went to the Birth Mom’s room to sign the adoption paperwork. It felt like the longest wait. After a while, our attorney came into our room and said she had signed the papers. We were free to leave the hospital with our son! That was the first time we felt relief in our adoption journey. Later, his Birth Mom told us she was grateful for those 48 hours with us. She felt like her time with him and us in the hospital helped her realize she was making the right decision.
After seven years of waiting, struggling, doubting, praying, and petitioning, we were parents. At the beginning of our adoption journey, we thought becoming parents through adoption depended on how hard-working we were. If we could apply to enough agencies, present the best profile, or write a good enough letter to the expecting mother, we’d be parents in no time. However, through our ten months of waiting to be matched, we realized that becoming parents through adoption requires our absolute dependence on God, who is the Faithful One. If you are on this journey, know it’s okay and normal to question and doubt, but also be reassured this is not where the Lord wants to leave you. Because He is the One who has brought us to adoption, He is also the faithful One who will complete it.