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Adoption Story: Jim and Denise

March 9, 2016 By Amy Young

Jim and Denise went into domestic adoption with their eyes wide open. They knew the risks that come with adoption. They had adopted their daughter from Russia several years ago and knew the?perseverance, faith,?and patience that come with the process. But they had other fears stepping into domestic adoption…would an expectant mother choose them? Would their age and the fact that they already had a child impact her decision? What about the risks of a failed adoption? Would they be able to handle all of the complexities of these issues and others? It turns out some of their greatest fears were realized. But also some of their greatest dreams. Today Denise shares their story and the amazing ways God was faithful in their second adoption…
We completed our adoption of our first daughter from Russia in October, 2010. Honestly, we both felt emotionally bruised from the experience. We were adopting during the time when another adoptive mom sent her son back to Moscow and became and international issue. The process was long and hard.
We both felt the call to adopt again…but fear got in our way. From the time Maria could speak, she prayed for a sibling. She was so persevering.
We no longer felt the call to adopt internationally, but did we have what it took emotionally to adopt domestically? The emotional risk to a failed adoption we both felt was just too much. And yet, the call to grow our family remained.
So after 4 years, we decided to start the domestic adoption process and we contacted Susan…She held our hand through all of the fears we had, and we set off. When our Lord gives us a call, he tells usPut out into the deep water and put your nets down for a catch.(Luke 5:4)? And despite the fear of having to emotionallytoil all night,’ just like Peter did, we obeyed and let down our nets. We were allowing ourself to be open to the fear of all that comes with the adoption process.
And the unthinkable happened, we had a failed adoption… The pain we both felt, the loss of the relationship with the expectant mom, the wonder of how the baby was fairing, was immense. We were bewildered and wondered, had we heard the call correctly?
We allowed ourselves a lot of time tojust be? after our adoption loss. We both needed time to grieve and process what happened.
Ultimately, God showed us his answer – to persevere. Despite the fear. Despite the risk. Despite the toil and emotional risk. We clung to his words,Do not be afraid.
Then, at the end of September, we heard about a beautiful woman who was making a plan for her son. We were worried, were we too old?? We already had one daughter. Would we be left unchosen yet again? We heard ouryes? the first week of October. And she chose us precisely because we were older and we had another child already!
Then began the great opportunity to love this lovely, brave woman. We had a chance to love her in the purest way possible. We didn’t know a whole lot about her past- which was deeply troubled. We just saw her as a beautiful woman, who needed compassion and encouragement. We poured our prayers and our support into her! We visited with her in her state on two occasions and spoke with her weekly by phone. It all came very naturally because she was just so?lovable. We chose his name together.James would be his middle name and was deeply significant to both of us. It was a very special moment.
Our sweet boy was due in mid January, but surprised us by coming six weeks early. We had decided not to share our match with anyone- so our families were pleasantly surprised by our early Christmas present!
The time in the hospital was absolutely full of joy but also grief. We grieved so very much for this dear woman who gave us the gift of a son. I can’t imagine the amount of courage this took. We grieved for her because of her brokenness. She began to pull away in an attempt to protect herself. We poured our love out to her. In those last moments together, we promised our forever love to her and to her son. We heard from her for about a week after Adam was born and sadly, she has been quiet since then.
Our hearts miss her presence, but we understand. We pray for her every single day. We pray for specifically her health and healing. Our love continues to grow for her as our sweet son has her beautiful features. And her wide, beautiful smile. We pray for specifically her health and healing. And hope someday for her to be able to see the son we share.
A few details on God’s fidelity in the little things. Adam was discharged from the hospital on the Monday before Christmas. The agency told us to not expect to be home before New Year’s. Well, ha! We were cleared to return to our home state the day before Christmas Eve. We made it home for Christmas to celebrate as a family of four! Trust in our Lord’s dealing of all of the practical details of adoption – He does not disappoint.
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Adoption is messy and risky. But it is so worth being faithful to God’s call. It is okay to be older, or overweight, or whatever… This is part of the story he?knits together. And now, we have our son. We could not be more in love!

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  • Open AdoptionOpen Adoption

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"I’m so excited to share Matt and Laura’s adop "I’m so excited to share Matt and Laura’s adoption story with you today! I was introduced to this precious couple by one of my other sweet CAC families. When their home study and profile were done, they were ready to start presenting to situations. My heart ached every single time I had to send them an email that said, 'I’m so sorry. The expectant mother has decided to move forward with another family.' I knew their story. I knew their heart. I knew everything that they had been through and it broke my heart to deliver this news each time. But they never gave up. They continued pressing forward through their fears, doubts, questions- and a pandemic! Their story has been an inspiration to me and I know many others. Today, they share the story that led them to their baby boy." - CAC Adoption Consultant Kelly @kellybethtodd⁣
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***To continue reading click on the link in our bio***⁣
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#CACadoption #christianadoptionconsultants #lovemakesafamily #adoptionbuiltus #domesticadoption #adoption  #adoptionjourney #adoptionislove #adoptionstory #adoptionconsultant #adoptionstories #adoptionislove  #adoptiveparent #adoptiontriad #bettertogether #adoptioncommunity #domesticinfantadoption #adoptionishard #adoptioneducation #openadoption
Did you know we are one of the largest, oldest, an Did you know we are one of the largest, oldest, and most experienced adoption consulting firms in the world? There are many aspects of our services that set us apart, but today we wanted to touch on our professional and personal experience. Since 2006 we have assisted over 3,300 families with successful adoptions. CAC not only has a collective team of adoptive parents (45 children between the entire team), but also adoption professionals with over 120 years of combined experience. Our staff also includes a licensed and practicing social worker with 20+ years of experience, 2 birth parents, and an adoptee with birth parent and adoptee consultations as part of our services. ⁣
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If you are interested in receiving a FREE adoption packet, click on the link in our bio! ⁣
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#CACadoption #christianadoptionconsultants #lovemakesafamily #adoptionbuiltus #domesticadoption #adoption  #adoptionjourney #adoptionislove #adoptionstory #adoptionconsultant #adoptionstories #adoptionislove  #adoptiveparent #adoptiontriad #bettertogether #adoptioncommunity #domesticinfantadoption #adoptionishard #adoptioneducation #openadoption⁣
"When my phone lights up with a text from Jenny, I "When my phone lights up with a text from Jenny, I know I'm about to see the sweetest baby face and an update with how things are going. Just today I got a video filled with baby giggles, adoring siblings, and a family who grew from five to six in seven months. Jenny shares today about their adoption and specifically their experience working with Christian Adoption Consultants." -CAC Adoption Consultant Susan⁣
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#CACadoption #christianadoptionconsultants #lovemakesafamily #adoptionbuiltus #domesticadoption #adoption  #adoptionjourney #adoptionislove #adoptionstory #adoptionconsultant #adoptionstories #adoptionislove  #adoptiveparent #adoptiontriad #bettertogether #adoptioncommunity #domesticinfantadoption #adoptionishard #adoptioneducation #openadoption
"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light ca "Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that." -Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. ⁣⁣
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Today we celebrate the life and legacy of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. May his words compel us every day to reflect God’s heart of love for all people. Lord, grow us, humble us, change us that all may see one another as image bearers of God.⁣
Tonight CAC Adoption Advocate and Birth Mother, Lo Tonight CAC Adoption Advocate and Birth Mother, Lori, shares a beautiful poem entitled, "Trees." @shabbysnap 
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𝐓𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐬⁣⁣
𝘉𝘺 𝘓𝘰𝘳𝘪 𝘋𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘤𝘩⁣⁣
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Funny how long they live⁣
Sending branches upward in heaves⁣
Reminding us of how we ought to be⁣
Relying on strength and agility⁣
In storms that swirl and pound and break⁣
Outward limbs, sometimes shake⁣
Seasons show upon their face⁣
Animals take rest in the shade⁣
Breath we take, exhaled for granted ⁣
Fruit they give freely, always enchanted ⁣
Though they watch and keep an eye⁣
On our life, just standing by⁣
Supplies provided, home to dwell⁣
Glory scattered in fall’s carnival⁣
Outlast, but never giving in⁣
Carrying us to the grave again⁣
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"The trees of the Lord are well watered, the cedars of Lebanon that he planted. There the birds make their nests; the stork has its home in the junipers'' (Psalm 104:16-17).⁣⁣
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"Her ways are pleasant ways, and all her paths are peace. She is a tree of life to those who take hold of her; those who hold her fast will be blessed. By wisdom the Lord laid the earth’s foundations, by understanding he set the heavens in place" (Proverbs 3:17-19).⁣⁣
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#CACadoption #christianadoptionconsultants #lovemakesafamily #adoptionbuiltus #domesticadoption #adoption  #adoptionjourney #adoptionislove #adoptionstory #adoptionconsultant #adoptionstories #adoptionislove  #adoptiveparent #adoptiontriad #bettertogether #adoptioncommunity #domesticinfantadoption #adoptionishard #adoptioneducation #openadoption⁣⁣
This afternoon we have another adoption story over This afternoon we have another adoption story over on our blog. We pray it will be an encouragement to you wherever you are in your journey! "Did we hear God wrong? It's easy to second guess your adoption plans when you're in the middle of the process; in the trenches of the wait. Sometimes even easy to second guess your faith and your ability to clearly hear God's call. But I've learned that God is always at work, even when we can't see it. Chris and Jen had these questions and decided to give up their plans for growing their family through adoption. And that's exactly the time they received a call about their son. Today Jen shares the questions, and the answers, that led them to their family of two growing to three." - CAC Adoption Consultants Susan @svansyckle ⁣
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#CACadoption #christianadoptionconsultants #lovemakesafamily #adoptionbuiltus #domesticadoption #adoption  #adoptionjourney #adoptionislove #adoptionstory #adoptionconsultant #adoptionstories #adoptionislove  #adoptiveparent #adoptiontriad #bettertogether #adoptioncommunity #domesticinfantadoption #adoptionishard #adoptioneducation #openadoption
"Expectations. They can kind of make us or break u "Expectations. They can kind of make us or break us, can’t they? As I’ve walked with many people through their adoption journeys, I’ve seen families crushed by unrealistic expectations and I’ve seen families beautifully hope in God as they’ve surrendered their expectations to Him. So what does it look like to have reasonable expectations during your adoption and specifically as you work with an adoption consultant at Christian Adoption Consultants? What does it look like for adoption expectations to 'make you' rather than 'break you?'" -CAC Adoption Consultant Katie F. @katiefenska ⁣
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***Click on the link in our bio to continue reading about adoption expectations***⁣
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#CACadoption #christianadoptionconsultants #lovemakesafamily #adoptionbuiltus #domesticadoption #adoption  #adoptionjourney #adoptionislove #adoptionstory #adoptionconsultant #adoptionstories #adoptionislove  #adoptiveparent #adoptiontriad #bettertogether #adoptioncommunity #domesticinfantadoption #adoptionishard #adoptioneducation #openadoption
We have another adoption story on the blog this ev We have another adoption story on the blog this evening! "It was an honor to walk with Jamey and Sydnee through their adoption journey. When we first connected I remember Sydnee opening up about their long journey through infertility and loss. She shared her heart and about the journey that led them to this specific place and time. She also shared some of their fears with me about the adoption process, one of them being too old' to be desirable to an expectant mother. As she was talking I remember thinking to myself, 'I'm so glad that God connected my path to these amazing people and I can't wait to see what the Lord has in store for them.' Their journey through the adoption process wasn't easy, but that same journey, the one with ups and downs, the one with disappointment, the one with waiting, led them to their daughter and I know they wouldn't change a thing about it. Jamey and Sydnee, thank you for allowing me to walk with you through the adoption process. I am beyond amazed at the story God wrote for your family! Today Sydnee shares that story..." -CAC Adoption Consultant Kelly @kellybethtodd⁣
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#CACadoption #christianadoptionconsultants #lovemakesafamily #adoptionbuiltus #domesticadoption #adoption  #adoptionjourney #adoptionislove #adoptionstory #adoptionconsultant #adoptionstories #adoptionislove  #adoptiveparent #adoptiontriad #bettertogether #adoptioncommunity #domesticinfantadoption #adoptionishard #adoptioneducation #openadoption
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