Brian & Bethany’s adoption stories are incredible examples of how God’s goodness and love remains with us through both the easy and challenging times. A whirlwind of events, trust, and continued perseverance led them to experience His mercy and abounding care. Here they share their adoption journey and how ultimately He constructed beauty from brokenness.
We’ve had the blessing of working with Christian Adoption Consultants for two adoptions. Our first was in 2020 when we adopted our oldest son, Desmond. Their help was absolutely invaluable in navigating the emotionally and logistically difficult process of adoption. When our oldest son was about 9 months old, we got quite the shock that his biological mama was expecting again and wanted us to parent this baby boy as well. We were floored and overjoyed, and it was the easiest “yes” we could ever say. Before that call, we weren’t sure we wanted to pursue adoption again or if our family was complete, but once we learned about this sweet little one, we knew we wanted our son to grow up with his full biological brother.
However, just 2 weeks before the due date, his birth mama reached out to us to tell us that she felt she was now in a place to parent. We of course fully supported her decision to parent her child, but we were completely blindsided and it took some time to process our new reality. We truly wanted the best for her and her baby, so it was easy to feel happiness for them, but it did not remove the heartbreak of months of anticipating a new little one and then having plans change so quickly.
After taking some time to grieve, we decided that we had gotten so excited about Desmond being a big brother and adding a new little one to our family, that we wanted to continue to pursue another adoption placement. We started the process from scratch with a renewed hope that God’s plans were always better than our own. Except this time, we were going through this process during COVID, and the adoption world had been significantly affected for various reasons, all leading to a much different wait time than we’d previously experienced. After months of waiting, only presenting our family profile a few times, and hearing no’s, we were accepting the reality of a much longer wait, and even considering applying to more agencies.
About a week later on a random Tuesday our lawyer called to let us know the news that his birth mama had decided to place the baby with us, after almost 5 months of parenting. We felt shock, disbelief, and an intense sadness and concern for her, all while feeling simultaneous joy at the thought of these sweet boys growing up together after all. We love our sons’ first mama dearly, and it was a strange time of holding hope and grief at the same time. Knowing that she was about to go through another excruciating experience of relinquishing a child once again was heart wrenching. We did not want to diminish that reality, but we were also over the moon that this little one would be joining our family.
Through a series of miraculous events, and SO MUCH prayer, all adoption papers had been signed and we were in the car heading to Florida. Just 5 days after that life changing call, we met our second son Winston, for the first time. Looking back on the roller coaster of our adoption experience, I can see the Lord’s hand working in our lives and our boys’ stories. The disappointments of hearing “no’s” and the discouragement of waiting months all make sense now that we know God had this specific little one for our family. I doubt we will ever fully understand the reason why he orchestrated our story the way that he did, but I do know that God is good. He is always working for our good and his glory, even when we cannot see it.